My girlfriend doesn’t think Donny Osmond could be someone you could sit down at lunch with and talk about LOST.
I think she’s wrong.
The Amazing Race: All-Stars – Season 11 – Episode 6
Want to see a graphical view of the racers from beginning to present? Click on the below graphic. (Opens in a new window. Takes a moment to load.)
This week’s rundown:
Charla & Mirna
THIS WEEK – 1st
LAST WEEK – 1st, arriving at 9:07am
Wake me when it’s over. This has to be a nightmare. 2 times in first? What the hell did I eat before bed to be tortured like this. Too hot to handle. Barf.
Oswald & Danny
THIS WEEK – 2nd
LAST WEEK – 4th, arrived at 10:18am
Would have been first if they hadn’t stopped for fruit. C’mon guys, the irony of it?
Uchenna & Joyce
THIS WEEK – 3rd
LAST WEEK – 7th, arriving at 10:36am
Even with a 30 minute penalty – marked for elimination – at the mat, they still came in third. After all the airport trouble this week, I don’t even think anyone was close.
Dustin & Kandice
THIS WEEK – 4th
LAST WEEK – 2nd, arriving at 9:47am
No over thinking. No misreading clues. Solid middle of the pack. They could go either way.
Eric & Danielle
THIS WEEK – 5th
LAST WEEK – 6th, arriving at 10:33am
Oooo… they got screwed at the airport this time around. I don’t blame Danielle for breaking down. On her original season I’d totally have given her a hard time about this. Maybe it was all in the editing. Maybe everybody looks better when Mirna is around…
Joe & Bill
THIS WEEK – 6th
LAST WEEK – 5th, arriving at 10:32am
Teri & Ian might be nicer but they aren’t as interesting as Joe & Bill plus these guys do have a chance to win it. I’m glad they’re still in it.
Who got kicked off?
Teri & Ian
THIS WEEK – 7th
LAST WEEK – 3rd, arriving at 10:13am
Not a surprise. Good people but they were not going to win. I would have REALLY rather seen Charla and Mirna here. Well, at LEAST Mirna. 😉
The Amazing Race: All-Stars – Season 11 – Episode 5
This week’s rundown:
Charla & Mirna
THIS WEEK – 1st
LAST WEEK – 7th, arriving at 2:41am
Argh. First they gloat about putting Rob & Amber out of the race – like they really had anything to do with it. Now they come in first. Maybe next they could give Mirna a megaphone to go with her whistle from last week. Because I really think they could be more annoying.
Dustin & Kandice
THIS WEEK – 2nd
LAST WEEK – 5th, arriving at 1:58am
Well, they didn’t over think this week! Let’s see how long it lasts… However! They did misread ANOTHER clue. Not over thinking doesn’t mean NOT thinking girls!
Teri & Ian
THIS WEEK – 3rd
LAST WEEK – 3rd, arriving at 1:04am
I like them. I just don’t think they can keep it up.
Oswald & Danny
THIS WEEK – 4th
LAST WEEK – 1st, arrived at 12:02pm
Uh-oh… The avalanche beacon was looking a lot like a Rob & Amber arrogance moment. Take a breath guys, you can do it! Hmm… Guess I’m voting for these guys now. Didn’t realize that until just a moment ago. Go not-annoying gay team!!! 😉
Joe & Bill
THIS WEEK – 5th
LAST WEEK – 4th, arriving at 1:55am
Solid players. I mean in the game.
Eric & Danielle
THIS WEEK – 6th
LAST WEEK – 2nd, arriving at 12:06pm
If Oswald & Danny don’t win it, I’m voting Eric & Danielle. They’re silly. Looks like she melts down a little bit next week from the previews though…
Who got kicked off? – NOBODY! Non-elimination week.
Uchenna & Joyce
THIS WEEK – 7th
LAST WEEK – 6th, arriving at 2:38am
I said last week they shouldn’t get cocky. Now they have to come in first next week or suffer a 30 minute penalty at the mat.
Good example of why I don’t like reviewers most times.
Click here for an unfavorable review of “300”.
This is the kind of guy who salivates all over “boring – narcissistic – overly – costumed – judy – dench – historical – pieces – to – win – oscars – for – wannabe – pretentious – jerks” films. But hey, I don’t want to trash the guy or anything. 😉
I kid you not. This picture came from a site with kid’s coloring book pages.
Click to enlarge.
Not to mention, it’s already colored. Disturbing *and* weird.
A good friend of mine (see, honey, I didn’t mention your name) had “supplied” me with a rather sizeable stockpile of pens from her employer to help me offset even a fraction of the cost operating in a small business environment. She had another bundle today and asked if I needed any more. “Yes! You’re an angel!” I replied exhuberantly. “The b*stards at work keep stealing them!”
The Amazing Race: All-Stars – Season 11 – Episode 4
This week’s rundown:
Oswald & Danny
THIS WEEK – 1st, Won a trip for two to Maui with kayak trip and submarine tour!
LAST WEEK – 5th, arrived at 6:51pm
Oh, those lovable gay friends. Is this The Amazing Race or a pilot for a sitcom? I like this team, but c’mon editors, I’m sure they talk normal *sometimes*.
Eric & Danielle
THIS WEEK – 2nd
LAST WEEK – 3rd, arriving at 6:28pm
Speaking of editing… Every time he says “boobs” he gets airtime. Regardless, this is my odds on favorite for the win now that Rob & Amber biffed it.
Teri & Ian
THIS WEEK – 3rd
LAST WEEK – 6th, arriving at 6:53pm
They’ll do well. So long as every other team keeps screwing up.
Joe & Bill
THIS WEEK – 4th
LAST WEEK – 7th, arriving at 8:05pm
They had a bad week last week. Personally, I think it was the close proximity to Charla and Mirna. This week, I’d have been racing faster too to get away from those two. They passed Rob & Amber and Dustin & Candice on the detour so fast, they never knew what hit ’em.
Dustin & Kandice
THIS WEEK – 5th
LAST WEEK – 4th, arriving at 6:48pm
The girls called it better than I could. They overthink *everything*. It must take them an hour just to pick out hairspray.
Uchenna & Joyce
THIS WEEK – 6th
LAST WEEK – 2nd, arriving at 6:26pm
Okay, okay. You’ve beat Rob & Amber twice. Don’t get cocky. You could be watching the show from the couch with Rob just as easily.
Charla & Mirna
THIS WEEK – 7th
LAST WEEK – 8th, arriving at 8:11pm
A whistle? Who the hell gave Mirna a whistle?!? OMG people. She really *can* be more annoying.
Who got kicked off?
Rob & Amber
THIS WEEK – 8th – Literally at a destination dubbed “the end of the world”.
LAST WEEK – 1st, arrived at 6:11pm
Arrogance and stubborness. Rob, you didn’t win survivor, and now you havn’t won Amazing Race *twice*. Think about it. Amber told you that you were wasting too much time building a sign on the detour. Nothing can beat you, except yourself it seems. On the plus side you have some pride in the fact Amazing Race will probably lose half it’s viewership now that you and Amber are gone. Hate to say it, but there were so many other teams I’d have rather seen go first.
The Amazing Race: All-Stars – Season 11 – Episode 3
This week’s rundown:
Okay… I posted the rundown and the WordPress database chewed it up and swallowed it whole (much like how the Spartans did it to the Persians in the movie 300, based on the epic graphic novel by Frank Miller). The server hadn’t run a backup yet, and so, either rewrite the whole thing or miss a week. By far it was the funniest, most poignant recap I’d ever written and I couldn’t just post a substandard uninspired copy from memory. 😉
Truthfully, I’ve had to post this message twice now too. How have I angered the blog Gods?!??! I went to see the movie 300, based on the epic graphic novel by Frank Miller last night… hoping in some weird way I’ve made up for the bad karma. Yeah, I don’t know what it has to do with anything either… I just wanted to mention the title of the movie (300, based on the epic graphic novel by Frank Miller) for the search engines. 😉
Oh yeah, Rob & Amber won again and David & Mary went home. Pretty sure Charla and Mirna were annoying. See you next week.
The Amazing Race: All-Stars – Season 11 – Episode 2
This week’s rundown:
Rob & Amber
THIS WEEK – 1st – Each won an off-road motorcycle! Like they can’t afford them themselves.
LAST WEEK – 1st, arrived at 7:42pm
Next season, CBS is renaming the show “The Amazing Race Against Rob & Amber”. Rob is still pushing for the shortened, “The Amazing Rob & Amber”.
Oswald & Danny
THIS WEEK – 2nd
LAST WEEK – 2nd, arrived at 7:53pm
Solid race. Waiting to see the cat fight between them and Team Guido. This race just isn’t gay enough for the both of them! 😉
Joe & Bill
THIS WEEK – 3rd
LAST WEEK – 5th, arriving at 8:25pm
They came in right on Oswald & Danny’s ass. Ironic.
Eric & Danielle
THIS WEEK – 4th
LAST WEEK – 4th, arriving at 8:24pm
They seem oddly quiet – but running a solid race so far.
Uchenna & Joyce
THIS WEEK – 5th
LAST WEEK – 7th, arriving at 8:35pm
Bored. The only reason they are in this race is that they beat Rob & Amber the first time around.
Dustin & Kandice
THIS WEEK – 6th
LAST WEEK – 6th, arriving at 8:34pm
Smart racers but two weeks at 6th doesn’t get you the tiara girls.
Teri & Ian
THIS WEEK – 7th
LAST WEEK – 3rd, arriving at 8:17pm
I still like them, but as an ex-cop I sure wouldn’t have wanted his “attention to detail” on my case. Dropped from 3rd to 7th. Ouch.
Charla & Mirna
THIS WEEK – 8th
LAST WEEK – 8th, arriving at 8:50pm
The first week it was nostalgic to see them. Now someone please shoot them.
David & Mary
THIS WEEK – 9th
LAST WEEK – 9th, arriving at 8:51pm
Alliance with Charla & Mirna? Did they even *WATCH* their own season of the race?
Who got kicked off?
Kevin & Drew
THIS WEEK – 10th
LAST WEEK – 10th, arriving at 9:44pm
I would have pegged them as next out. No surprise. Now Drew can go home and check back into the old folk’s home. Geez.
The Amazing Race: All-Stars – Season 11 – Episode 1
This week’s rundown:
Rob & Amber
THIS WEEK – 1st – Won a resort package in Whistler Canada! Like they can’t afford it themselves.
LAST WEEK – Reviewing tapes of every episode of Amazing Race to profile competing teams.
CBS is a ratings whore. I’ll bet Rob & Amber have already gotten a nice fat check from The Amazing Race whether they win or not. Any takers?
Oswald & Danny
THIS WEEK – 2nd
LAST WEEK – Counseling, from the sounds of it.
Wait-a-minute… I thought Joe & Bill were the obligatory gay couple…
Teri & Ian
THIS WEEK – 3rd
LAST WEEK – Hat shopping with Crocodile Dundee.
I like them. I’d like to see them teach some youngsters a lesson or two.
Eric & Danielle
THIS WEEK – 4th
LAST WEEK – Making vows not to sleep with members of other teams – anymore.
Whoever said whoring and slutting around on national tv wouldn’t get you somewhere!
Joe & Bill
THIS WEEK – 5th
LAST WEEK – Botox.
Can you imagine how arrogant they’d be if they’d actually *won* their original race?
Dustin & Kandice
THIS WEEK – 6th
LAST WEEK – Still recovering from last year’s race.
Maybe they should offer an alliance to the Coalminers. 😉
Uchenna & Joyce
THIS WEEK – 7th
LAST WEEK – Living off the interest on the million dollars they already won.
Did I hear my ears right? They won a million dollars in their original race and they have the audacity to complain about things in their opening interview? Cry me a river folks.
Charla & Mirna
THIS WEEK – 8th
LAST WEEK – Mirna primping for Phil. Charla doing all the work. Just like old times.
Charla! Charla! Charla! Hear we go again folks… I only hope this race we get to see Charla go all medieval on Mirna at some point.
David & Mary
THIS WEEK – 9th
LAST WEEK – Getting Mary’s teeth fixed.
No alliance? No chance.
Kevin & Drew
THIS WEEK – 10th
LAST WEEK – Obviously not running lessons.
Well, okay, maybe David & Mary *do* have a chance.
Who got kicked off?
John Vito & Jill
THIS WEEK – 11th
LAST WEEK – Not realizing how soon they’d be back home.
A really *good* chance. They seemed like nice folks but out of everyone, this team was least memorable to me. They said the first leg helped them to refocus on their relationship – which had faded to only friends – so they’re already winners! Now pack your bags and go the heck home.
I picked up a large bag of cheese popcorn from a gas station convenience store to have something to snack on while driving down the highway. I opened the bag before starting the car expecting the wonderful smell of processed cheesey goodness – but was instead greeted by a stale styrofoam odor. For two bucks I didn’t want to stand in line again, so I threw the bag in the car with thoughts of calling the company or visiting their website. However, a couple miles down the highway it started stinking up my whole car so I decided to roll down the window and just dump out the popcorn. I know, I know… littering. But I figured it was biodegradable and birds could eat it. Plus, it did really smell bad! I got the bag about half-way out the window when the wind caught it. As I was holding on to keep the bag and my hand (also biodegradable, I suppose) from flying down the highway I felt something hitting my face and arms. A good portion of the stinky cheese popcorn had flown back *into* the car in a flurry of powdery orange snow. Two days later and I’m still picking out stale popcorn from the seats. At least anything I miss is biodegradable, I remind myself.
My brother brought over his Nintendo Wii and a boxing game to my birthday party. Concept in a nutshell – for anyone living under a rock since this thing’s debut – is that you hold a controller in each hand, jump around and punch the air like a madman, and your video game avatar beats the heck out of your opponent (or vice versa).
Wii Boxing Game
Only two matches and the next day my right arm was falling off and my shoulder blade felt like I’d been working on a chain gang. No, it has nothing to do with turning 40. 😉
Me and my buddy Ken – Geek Boxing
It’s time for me to start writing children’s books.
Description: A fat old cow wanted to jump over the moon so her friend the mule gathered their animal friends together to build a rocket to get her to the moon. In the end, it didn’t work but she was happy as she got to stay on Earth with her friends.
Author: Louise Lawrence Devine, Illustrator: Irma Wilde, Publisher: Rand McNally (1965)
Really. No kidding.
Not a manly shopping cart.
I tried to think of it as a “sports car” model.
This would *SO* happen to me.
I’d be minding my own business, jumping out of a field and BLAMMO – hit by a bike. 😉
You must be at least 8′ tall to use these cotton balls.
No kidding. This was the only place they were at!
The Amazing Race – Season 10 – Episode 12 & 13 (Finale)
Okay, okay. This is *way* late. I checked my blog stats, however, and nobody is reading these recaps anyway. So, to all of you not reading this, Nah, nah, na, na, nah! Oooga booga!!! Pbbt! See how childish I can be when none of you are looking. 😉 Episode 12 wasn’t much except the three remaining teams jockying for position for the final. Well, that plus I misplaced all my notes somewhere and deleted the episode off the TiVo. Oops…
WINNERS OF SEASON 10 THE AMAZING RACE… TYLER & JAMES – EX-ADDICT MODELS!
THIS WEEK – 1st
LAST WEEK – 1st, arrived at
Ex-Addict Models (Tyler & James) – So I’m glad they won… out of the remaining teams. By the timeliness of my post, I don’t have to tell you how excited I really was. Truthfully, they really do seem like okay guys. I think after thinking about it for a month, I’m still just jaded that my application for the race was never accepted. My New Year’s resolution is to just let the bitterness go. 😉
THIS WEEK – 2nd
LAST WEEK – 3rd, arrived at ???
Rob & Kimberly – They came in second. They stayed together. Please don’t bring them back on an all-stars season.
THIS WEEK – 3rd
LAST WEEK – 2nd, arrived at ???
Moms (Lyn & Karlyn) – Ah, if only they hadn’t even made it back into the country. But in the end, I saved my final wish to the Jeanie of the Lamp (R) that more orphans might be adopted by Madonna and Angelina Jolie.
Merry Christmas everybody!
Hope everyone had a safe and happy holiday! 🙂
This holiday season, shopping has been an eye-opener. First the whole “Bath & Body Works” alien cannibal conspiracy, and now I have proof that “Pier One” is linked to nefarious James Bond villain Auric Goldfinger.
Captured with my trusty camera phone – at great risk of life and limb, I might add – is proof.
I don’t know who the anonymous teddy bear was or what he did to have his demise so publicly displayed. Entire body covered in gold paint and left to suffocate.
Just as Jill Masterton, Auric Goldfinger’s secretary, was killed when she betrayed Goldfinger by helping James Bond.
Shop at your own peril.
I was walking through Bath & Body Works with my girlfriend and noticed a *lot* of the items they are serving the public with are food themed.
Twisted Peppermint…
Wickedly Hot Chocolate…
Cinnamon Bun Heaven…
Pumpkin Paradise…
It wasn’t my girlfriend staring at the two-for-one clearence that made the hairs at the back of my neck stand on end. I suddenly remembered an old episode of the Twilight Zone (#89 to be exact) where an alien race came to earth…
…with a book about serving man…
…which turned out to be a cookbook!
If any of you on the Internet can still read this, warn the public! Bath & Body Works is not there to serve you with feel-good lotions and fragrances – they are flavoring us for their cannibal alien masters!
