Monthly Archives: January 2004

What’s worse than diet cola? FLAT diet cola. Although, why I picked up the cola can from the night before and thought it was a good idea to take a sip is a complete mystery. Hey, does anyone have a … Continue reading →

My life as a cartoon… Working with my brother and business partner I seem to end up knee deep in code while he test drives the programs. I’m Tinker, the goofy mechanic (green jumpsuit) from Speed Buggy and he’s Mark, the … Continue reading →

The newspaper in our area recently reported on a set of conjoined twins. They listed the weight as 8 lbs 5 oz. A good friend of mine heard this and asked, “Is that how much they weigh together or seperately?” … Continue reading →

I went to eat at a Chinese buffet tonight. They have a wall length mirror that runs alongside where you get your food. I wouldn’t think this would be in their best interest. It’s as if you can see yourself … Continue reading →

Pink candles and an umbrella. 37 must be the “I’m comfortable with my heterosexuality” birthday.

Happy Birthday to Me Happy Birthday to Me Everyone older than me keeps saying “I’m catching up” to them. Only if I kill them.

On the importance of enunciation… Be careful with statements like “I practice self-deprecating humor.”

Butch eye for the girlie girl. Just wait.

I was telling someone about the wonderful beignets I had in New Orleans. Just for the record, it’s a square doughnut with no hole buried in powdered sugar. It’s pronounced BEN-yay and should not be confused with BEN-wa. Some people … Continue reading →

Thoughts about online dating… (part 3) I used to think Seinfeld was rediculously funny. More like poignantly funny.

Thoughts about online dating… (part 2) Somebody really needs to skim the dating pool. Or drain it.

Thoughts about online dating… (part 1) If you have a pool of contestants the size of Czechoslovakia, and you run a show like “American Idol” do you *really* expect a number one hit on the charts?

Another blog entry proving I’m obsessed with New Orleans… When they vote for most friendly city, I think the following story should be taken into account: My brother Keith and I (yeah, yeah, another “My brother and I…” story) were … Continue reading →

Gomer Pyle – part 2 Prostitutes. I’d like to think of myself as worldly, but in the end, I’m still more Midwestern boy than anything else. Pretty much, I’d figure on bumping into, and starting a conversation with, a Cuban … Continue reading →

Gomer Pyle – part 1 Evening in Fort Wayne – mosquitoes. Evenings in New Orleans French Quarter – prostitutes. Okay, so perhaps that’s a bit extreme, but I’ve never felt so “aww shucks!” Midwestern than walking down Bourbon street this … Continue reading →

New Orleans – Night 3 (of 3) Last day of the conference! Yeah! They hold these things in places like Vegas and New Orleans so the participants don’t die of boredom, resurrect themselves, and then brutally kill themselves again rather … Continue reading →

New Orleans – Night 2 (of 3) Morning. I discovered that New Orleans pigeons subsist on a diet of spilled beer and powdered sugar. I’d swear the birds at the Cafe Dumonde were stoned. One of them was walking around … Continue reading →

New Orleans – Night 1 (of 3) Rainy. A little cold. Won $40 playing the nickel slots in the casino. Was jones’ing to play craps like last year in Vegas but the tables all had $10 minimums (too steep). Still … Continue reading →